Inside the Mind of Bob 

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Bored

Pre-emptive edit: Don't even read this. I spent 2 hours on it from 3-5 am. It's just depressing crap rants and nostalgia. Go spend your time reading something interesting.


I knew this post was eventually coming, a vent post to let all my boredom and anger of the moment out (hey, a journal, on-line or not, is a type of therapy). Just go ahead and completely skip reading this if you want. Really. It's more for me than anyone else.

Annoyances (in ascending order):

I've got work 3 days this week, then I go straight to Hurricanes Friday, Saturday and Sunday, essentially killing this week's free time.

Can't go to Mark's continuing LAN at his house because 1) I'm working/going to Hurcs all week and 2) my dad won't let me bring my computer over anyway because the router didn't work last time I brought it home (thanks Mark!).

I'm on a really bad sleeping schedule. Posting this at 3 AM because I'm bored, but not tired in the least. I usually have to set my alarm for 3 PM, yes PM, to wake up in time to get ready for work since I'm staying up later and later every night.

Dell is retarded. Yes, they are sending me a great laptop system, but they're going to take forever-and-a-day to build, program, and ship it. Plus, they're sending it in three separate orders so I'll get my printer around the 20th of August (and no computer to use it with), the laptop around early September (when I'll already be at Tufts, probably won't have it for my first classes), and the USB printer cable - the one I need to plug the printer into the laptop - sometime around September 10. It is absolutely BEYOND my comprehension why it's going to take the longest to send me a FREAKING CABLE and why they can't just put it in the same shipment as the printer.

My dad is annoying:

1) My car: I find a plastic grating broken on the hood of my Mustang before I go out one day. it looks like really cheap plastic, so I play around with the part a little to try to get it to fit back in, and decide I'll fix it later with some super glue, no big deal. My dad sees it, and the first words out of his mouth: "When were you at work last?!" implying that someone in the parking lot decided they were jealous of my POS '85 Mustang and broke a 3 inch long piece of plastic that looked like it could have come from a model car building kit, and then just walked away. I DID have my car beat up pretty bad by parking in the CVS lot one time, but now I know not to park by the train tracks where there are nice headlight-sized rocks lying around to tempt people to throw at my car, but it's just RIDICULOUS how paranoid my dad is. This was an obvious stress fracture from hot and cold changes simply because the car is old as hell, and he blows it out of proportion.

Even when I went to Mark's for the LAN, I told him I'd just park out on the curb for a few days, and he immediately says "You're gonna get hit." Now, if you knew Mark's street, you'd know no one goes over 15 mph on it because it's residential, a really crappy road, and people parked on both sides. The odds of someone singling out my car to hit or vandalize are millions to one, but my dad immediately assumes that since the car is SO GOOD that people will want to mess it up (honestly, it's a fuel-economy era car... the speedometer only goes up to 85 mph. My friend paid $800 for a Thunderbird that's twice as fast, much newer, and in better shape. However, my dad has his "friend's" he knows that always have 'great deals' for him, so he sells his Corvette and goes and buys the Mustang without looking around for any better deals- strange that he's so paranoid of people he doesn't know (like the mysterious villain guy he imagines that follows me around looking for ways to ruin my car at every chance) yet trusts people he KNOWS so much when he shouldn't).

2) My computer: First there's the issue with the router. As soon as something goes wrong, my dad thinks it's the end of the world and calls every tech support guy he knows while running anti-virus, scan disk, defragmenting and all the other crap all at once. He immediately bans me from bringing the computer anywhere ever again (whatever, I'll have a laptop that we bought with this idea in mind), and then tells me I have to fix it before I go anywhere. I had planned just to wait for Mark to help (maybe tell me what he changed on my settings to begin with and just reverse them), but now I'm on the phone with tech guys who don't speak English for 4 hours before I can fix the router and give my computer internet access again. Now, with the router not working, my dad could browse his webpages, email, and programs all on my brother's computer and not even worry about mine (since I wasn't worried, I was planning on playing Warcraft 3: the Frozen Throne single-player campaign for a while, and wouldn't need the internet).

Then there's the "virus" scare. My dad, paranoid as he is, reads an article somewhere about a virus (that they don't even name or mention how it works) is out, and you need to go to Microsoft to update your computer. it's the standard scare tactic media article, and my dad completely falls for it and goes and downloads every patch he can find for his work computer. When I get home from a long day at Hurricanes, this printed out article is the first thing I see, and I laugh at it while reading it, but my dad tells me I have to go find the update. So, I log onto Microsoft's page, follow the link, and it's a God damn Window's Update. I do a scan, and I'm up to date, so it's just been a waste of time reading the article and finding the site for the virus info. Additionally, it's so ironic that it's a Window's Update since my dad was such a big fan of it until he did one on my brother's computer (which formerly had Windows ME) and it installed an incompatible Internet Explorer 6.0 patch that completely ruined the computer (well, not the patch itself, but he panicked and reformatted and eventually bought the XP Home Edition Upgrade...since he already deleted all my brother's stuff anyway, it was just a better idea).

And the number one thing bugging me!!!...:
Crystal... no, not Crystal herself, the fact that I'm going to college and won't be able to see Crystal. I saw her a few days ago at Jon's house... she got my number/AIM but left before I got a chance to ask her for hers. I'm REALLY interested in her but she's going to Duquesne University in Pennsylvania... which is about a 8 hour drive from Connecticut, let alone Boston, and I'm not one to go for long-distance relationships (tried once, didn't work). And I haven't even asked her out or anything yet. Graduation is finally catching up with me... I'm starting to look back and I don't see the good times or the memories, I just think of missed opportunities. The closer I get to leaving for college the more things I think about that I could - SHOULD - have done in the last four years. This post itself wasted an hour and a half to write, and tomorrow I'll waste an entire day at work, and the day after that, and then a whole weekend at Hurricanes and the whole time I'll just be thinking about how I can't even contact Crystal and more and more time is slipping away... It's already a lost cause, but you need something to hope for, right? I'm leaving in two weeks. There's nothing left for me here in Milford. My future is unknown. When I leave, I'll have no past to bring with me, and no future secure in front of me. But I need SOMETHING. The something I create: HOPE. Hope that there's something important left for me here other than my final days at my crappy job at CVS, or the time-consuming Hurricanes practices - not that I don't enjoy them, but I honestly don't want to work at anything anymore, I just want my summer back. I want to think that there was someone in Milford who, as Mark often says "isn't required to" or "doesn't have to" love me, since that's the only real thing I can take with me anywhere I go.

I think the only real thing I can take with me is my memories, and right now they're all negative or hopeless. I'm supposed to be excited for the future, not dwelling on the past. I can't believe I wrote a graduation speech telling people not to do what I'm doing. I think I need to know that someone cares that I'm leaving, someone who "doesn't have to love me." I hope I'll find that with the band at least... first practice is August 18... I really miss everyone there. Band always gets put down, but it's a tight-knit group with a lot of great people (and enough madness and drama to keep you laughing besides). It's something I haven't quite found with Hurricanes yet... (the age difference makes it difficult... with people from 14 to 80 years old it's hard to find people you fit in with). I miss Ricky especially from band. Had a lot of great times with him. Couldn't even go to his graduation party since I had a Hurricanes competition the same day. It was supposed to be a party for both of us, but I'm a scheduling nightmare and we eventually gave up. I wrote an email to Karl too (best freshman this year... cool kid from Sweden - he had to go back there though, only spent a year here) still hasn't responded though. I miss the band so much I wish I could just spend a year here and be an instructor or equipment guy. It's been done by lots of graduates... but only those that stay in Milford.

Anyway...
Tomorrow is a new day ... (to waste - doomed before it even happens because of work)...
I'll have to get Crystal's number. Anyone lend a hand?... Still wasting time unable to talk to her.

Last Day of Class

Woohoo! Last day of philosophy class done! For those who didn't know, I've been taking a class called "Questions in Ancient and Medieval Philosophy" at Fairfield University. I got to take the class for free as part of the Governor's Scholar award (saved something like $1,000 for the class). Class went from June 30 to July 25, Monday through Friday, 10:40 AM to 12:40 PM. Not a good class for me (at least in schedule) because it meant I needed take wake up at 9 AM every morning to commute (and I-95 sucks). I think I'm getting an A- or an A (not that it really matters, since I don't care what grade I get since it's the only class I'll ever take there, and I doubt I can transfer the credit). Anyway, now I can sleep late again and have a REAL summer like I used to.

Beastly Laptop

Dude, I'm getting a Dell! (I think.)

We're planning on buying a computer for college, and given all the options, I think the best option is the Dell Inspiron 5150. I looked at a lot of computers... from Alienware(which makes the BEST computers in the world, but also the most expensive) to Dell (which makes a lot of really cheap computers with obsolete parts, but also offers a lot of amazing systems with great prices--something they can afford to do since they're the largest computer sales company in the world, last I heard). In any case, building your own computer is usually the best bet (PriceWatch is great for getting parts) as long as you know what brands and parts to buy, and know how to put it all together (I'm lucky enough to have a friend who does... I just know what parts are the best, not how they work). However, since I'm going to college, it'll be nice to have a laptop (something I've never owned). I was initially turned off from the idea because they're so much less powerful than desktops, and usually more expensive (for comparable parts) because of voltage, space, weight and heating variables you have to take into account. I found that I could make a top-of-the-line AMD desktop for around $1,600, while most laptops were weak and cost only a few hundred less... until I found the 5150. For around $1,700 (customized) I can get a Pentium 4 3.06 Ghz laptop with an ATi Radeon Mobility 9000 (64 MB) video card, 512 MB RAM, 40 Gig hard drive, XP Professional, a 3 or 4 year warranty, and other nice goodies. My current desktop has a Pentium 3 1.8 Ghz processor, 256 MB RAM, and a GeForce 3 (64 MB) video card... which means this laptop should be amazingly better. I still have some doubts about laptops (flatscreen monitor quality... underclocking issues due to heat... battery life... etc) but I hope we get it so I can take advantage of Tufts' wireless internet access and the portability of the laptop (I think I'm going to buy a locking file cabinet or chest for my room to store it in when I'm not there... every college says "We don't have stealing issues" but people are only human, and Ebay is the new pawn shop of the world).

The Final Result...:

After a year of ridiculously large amounts of work, I finally get my AP scores!

US History --- 5
English Language and Composition --- 5
Calculus AB --- 5
Spanish Language --- 4

(Plus last years...)
English Literature and Composition --- 4
European History --- 5

So, for the 2 history scores, the calculus score, and the English language score I get a total of 4 "acceleration credits" at Tufts... though I have no idea what that means. I also found out that I'm applying for sophomore standing according to this grade report... though I don't really remember checking that box, maybe I did it my Junior year and it stayed. In any case, 4 credits sounds like a lot of work saved... (assuming each class is 1 credit... I hope to God it's not 3 per class, or that's a huge amount of work I did for very little).

I also think I'm eligible for these AP Scholar things. I think this qualifies me as an "AP Scholar with Distinction" but it doesn't really do me any good. The site says, "Although there is no monetary award, in addition to receiving an award certificate, this achievement is acknowledged on any grade report that is sent to colleges the following fall." So basically I get a piece of paper and a recommendation to college, should I ever feel the need to apply to Tufts AGAIN next fall. You'd think with all the money collegeboard makes that they might give some scholarship money... I must've personally spent over $500 paying for SAT tests and score reports for AP and SATs sent to colleges I applied to, and I get a piece of paper that says I'm a scholar, and a recommendation to a college I can't even use. It would be cool to be an AP State Scholar (I doubt it though, probably kids in Amity and John Hopkin's who take 10 AP classes and get 5's on all of them), just because there's only 105 total recepients from 2001. That would actually mean something.

Million Man Lan 2 - Louisville, Kentucky

I realized I never did a post about it... It was a LAN held from June 26-29 ( Their Site ). it was a 15 hour drive to get there from Connecticut... Mark's mother and godmother were nice enough to volunteer to drive us there (they planned their own vacation anyway, we hardly saw them the whole week other than in the car). It was a decent drive (surprisingly) considering we fit Mark's mom, Mark's godmother, Mark, Andrew, and me in the car along with three (3!) computers and monitors, a cooler, pillows and blankets, a portable TV and DVD player and GameCube (with a power adapter), and luggage for 7 days (strapped on the roof.. I broke one of the straps as we packed to leave... I was a little worried about losing all our luggage on a major highway). Needless to say, that van was HEAVY. It really struggled getting up those Ohio hills. Wasn't a bad drive though, we stayed over in between so it wasn't a full 15 hour ride.

The LAN: for those that don't know, a LAN is a Local Area Network, which means that a bunch of computers that are "local" (Read for LAN purposes: "in the same warehouse-style room") get hooked up to each other on a network. Must have been 1,000 people there all linked together (like 10 ms ping, up to 50 mbps downloads from other computers, thousands of gigabytes of files). We signed up for the Counter-Strike tournament, had 12 people, so 2 teams of 5 (with back-ups). [For information on our clan, Netizen, go to #clan-n on gamesnet.net for IRC, or check out the web site. I won't try to explain the game of Counter-Strike if you don't know what it is already... so I'll just say it's a First Person Shooter game for the computer, and is heavily team oriented. Our "clan" (just another way of saying a team of friends who play competitively against other teams) is in CAL-m, and UGS-a. At the tournament, we came in 3rd (team 1) and 5th-8th bracket (team 2). The two teams actually played each other right before the semi-finals, team 1 beat us 13 to 11. AMAZING match (it sucks that they didn't record the matches, it would have been nice to go back and watch them), but right afterward (because of the delay for technical problems with mouse drivers) team 1 played a match on a map they hadn't practiced at all, and got eliminated.

That about covers the competitive side of the LAN... all the rest of the time was spent by most people downloading games/programs/music/porn/etc. off other people's computers or burning tons and tons of CDs with them. Others played in public servers against others in a variety of games just for fun (mostly what I did). Met some cool guys sitting around me... people from all over the US. I also got to meet a lot of people in the clan who I had only talked to online... Lots of fun guys (they got so drunk the last night though... it was funny watching the way they acted). Mostly, we did just the opposite of alcohol, Bawls Guarana, the ultimate caffeine drink. We were up until at least 7 am every morning, whereupon we would walk back to the hotel for breakfast, and then go to bed for a few hours (a system I love... I hate getting up in the morning). I drank something like 10 bottles of Bawls... enough caffeine to give me withdrawal headaches for a week after I got home. Great tasting carbonated drink... and beats the hell out of coffee! Can't beat it for only like $1.50 a bottle.

That pretty much sums up the LAN... free stuff, no sleep, Bawls, games, files, friends, competition. A lot of fun. I've only been to one other LAN before... in Virginia (my mom drove my brother and I to it) to meet 3 other Netizen guys for CP5. It was a really crappy LAN compared to MML2... less people, poor management and organization, no tournament computers (you played on the one you brought, while at MML2 they had 22 state-of-the-art BEASTS of computers to play on), literally in a warehouse (we're talkin cement floor and metal siding walls, MML2 was in Kentucky Fairgrounds), cold as HELL (it was right before Superbowl Sunday, MML2 had air conditioning =P), and not a stable connection (pings went up to 100 ms at some points). It was also held for fewer days, so it wasn't really worth the drive to get there. It was still fun, but NOTHING compared to MML2.

Oh, I almost forgot, pictures from the LAN are here.

Boring Day

All I did today was clean up my desk... I have this one corner next to the monitor where I just throw all my crap (mail, paperwork, change, wallet, cell phone, everything.) and realized I should probably do some work. It's basically one big "in box" of paperwork I haven't done or filled out (I actually found a paycheck buried in there a couple days ago... whoops...). Did some thank-yous to people who sent me money for graduation... some thank-yous to people who did recommendations for scholarships... some paperwork for Tufts (one read, "RESOND WITHIN 7 DAYS OF RECEIPT" and was dated June 2003... another whoops...though I was on vacation when it came, just got left on my desk, buried, forgotten...).

In other news, I found out my first AP Test score, I got a 5 of 5 on American History. Thanks to Dr. B. for calling me up at home, leaving a message to let me know my score. I love the history department at Jonathan Law, they're all so dedicated to teaching... Anyway, still have to find out the other three scores... and I'm debating whether to call the school and see if anyone there received the grade report, call Tufts and ask, or just call the AP number and pay like $15(?) to find out the score(s). The problem is if I call Jonathan Law there's probably no one there, or no one there with the authority to go find my scores (can't imagine asking a janitor to go into guidance and find out) assuming they even received the reports yet. If I call Tufts I'll feel dumb asking because I was the one who had the scores sent to them in the first place... (way to go College Board... don't send me my own scores), and they might not even have the scores yet. If I call the AP number, I don't know what it will cost... $15 per score, or per student (all scores)? It could get pretty expensive if it's something I don't really NEED to know, just WANT to know in advance what scores/exemptions-from-classes-at-Tufts I get.

Pirates of the Caribbean

I was surprised for two reasons seeing this movie:

1) I was going out to see it with some friends and thought we were going to see 28 Days Later, but SURPRISE! when I get there I find out we're seeing this.

2) I didn't expect it to be as good as it was.

This movie had enough plot and action to keep me satisfied, and Orlando Bloom (better known as Legolas of LotR) was actually a good actor to play his role. Johnny Depp was even better as Captain Jack Sparrow. Here's the best description I found to explain how great he was: "Depp absolutely makes this film happen with his hilarious performance as the mascara-sporting, wobble-legged drunken pirate channeling a drag queen through the rhythm and manner of The Rolling Stones' Keith Richards." ( http://www.joblo.com/piratesofthecaribbean.htm/ ). I respect this movie a lot more than T3, so I'm not even going to give spoilers (since the only point in that would be to convince people NOT to see it because it's too poor of a movie, and just read what I have to say to show how bad it is). I'm just going to say that I enjoyed it, and think everyone should go see it.

Frustration

!!!*SPOILER ALERT*!!!
***DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN TERMINATOR 3 YET***


OK, I saw Terminator 3 a few days ago, and I am so disappointed by it. It's always great watching Arnold (pronounced "Ah-nold") run around shooting and beating the hell out of everything and everyone, but the movie just seemed like filler. T1 and T2 were amazing movies. They each had stand-alone plots, great action, and great lines. T3 seems like it was just created to bridge the gap between T2 and T4 (it's plot just consists of "Let's run here, NO, here! NO, here!" and then ends with global nuclear destruction and an easy entrance for a T4). What annoys me the most, though, is how the "TX" (wasn't that the name of my calculator?...) isn't a better terminator. They make this big deal like how she can control other machines and has a gun for an arm that she's an "anti-terminator terminator," but she's a POS. I mean, c'mon... look at what they've done here... they've gone from the T-1000 molten-metal terminator of T2, the most AMAZING villain I know of in any movie, and taken a step BACK from that by creating this new TX. At the end of the movie, she gets hit by a helicopter, and gets absolutely DEVASTATED by it... all her armor stuff melts off, and she has to pull her legs off to go chase after John. It had to be the most pathetic defeat I've ever seen (compare it to T-1000, who takes grenades to the chest, freezing and shattering, and then pulls back together like it's nothing). It seems like they made her a crappy terminator just so they could make the plot work (like if they made her a step up from the T-1000, she'd just be too good to be stopped, and instead just made her a step down, and used hype to make her seem better, just so Arnold could smash her up). And the "morph" thing where she takes the form of something she touches? It's just retarded. They use it twice in the whole movie... like they just made this new skill up so they could fill some plot gaps. And Arnold says she has to TOUCH whatever she changes into, but in the CRS Skynet headquarters place she morphs into Katherine without having come into contact with her (although I feel like such a retard for pointing out a technicality, I felt it had to be said). The only use to this movie was creating a half-assed filler between T2 and T4 (which you know will be made eventually... though as a friend said, "Maybe by the time Arnold is 90"). I can't even picture a role for Arnold in a T4... I can't imagine how they could fit him into any kind of plot now that there's going to be a million generic terminators running around killing people. I anticipate that T4 will be an impressive movie, but with the awful script they used for T3, I hope some new management steps in to assure a good quality finale to the Terminator series.


EDIT:
Comment-
"You may be a retard, but the TX DID touch Katherine.
In the parking lot when the TX is asking for John Connor."

This is probably true, so i concede my retardedness on this point, but still think it's a really crappy ability.

I also was reminded of another annoyance in the movie, how Katherine, for the first HALF of the entire movie, just tries to escape and flails about and it takes her SHOOTING ARNOLD IN THE HEAD to realize "Hey, he's really a machine." If I recall T2 correctly, when they find the leader guy of the terminator project (the black guy, they break into his house), and he's skeptical, John just says something like, "Show him," and Arnold cuts all the skin off his arm to show that he's a machine (a little bit of overkill, but hey, it woulda been a better idea with Katherine instead of dragging her skeptical ass everywhere).

Last Days

Graduation practice today, graduation tomorrow. It better not rain... I've been to graduation every year since I was a freshman (with the band or with honor guard) and it's always been a beautiful, sunny day. This summer has been such crap so far, it has rained every weekend for the past 7 weeks or so, and ruined a lot of state matches for sports teams, practices for drum corps, and graduation parties (like the one I was at today, supposed to be a pool party... RAIN, DENIED.). My speech is all set tho... and my uncle and all three cousins are coming from upstate New York to see my graduation. And if it rains, we hold it inside, with limited space, so they won't be able to see it. I don't care if it rains, I'll stay outside. Graduation in a gym, especially one with our ghetto non-padded ceilings (terrible echo), just isn't the same. It feels like something you might see for an elementary school graduation.

Anyways, in other news... Ashley and I broke up. Long distance relationship not working, too busy to go and see her (Hurcs on weekends, and graduation parties, activities, etc. whenever I'm not at Hurcs). She never came down to visit me either, always seemed like I had to go visit her, when I can't leave home for an extended time or miss a whole bunch of crap.

In other news, I plan to ask Crystal out... Now, unlike Mark, who wrote a TERM PAPER masked in secrecy to explain that he likes a girl, I'm just gonna say it. http://wos.blogeasy.com/comment.list.run?blogID=1055907579770/ for that amazing show of stupidity (in my eyes).